Don’t Blink, You’ll Miss Something.

I talk about how I’m in shock that my tiny little bitty newborn has grown up so fast all the time. When people would tell me that I shouldn’t blink or I will miss something I used to think that was a load of BS. Nope, they were totally right. I spent a greater part of this morning packing up all the stuff that is now too small and restocked his closet and dressers with 9 & 12 month clothing. It was really sad folding all those tiny onesies! I feel like I forgot how small he really was and I’m completely blown away by how fast they grow. Next it’ll be 18 month clothing :((((( & I’ll have a toddler! I’m not ready for this!

Papa Bear’s First Post

Hey all! Papa Bear here. Sorry. I’m not very creative; I can’t come up with anything clever like “Tails from a not-so-conventional mommy.” I’ll settle with Papa Bear, because they have tails, right? Anyway, as my son is sitting next to me trying to thwart my attempts to type, I’ll talk about my parenting style. There are a lot of different parenting styles. We have many: authoritative father, the loving mother, the dead-beat dad, the wise man, etc. My wife calls me a great dad. I wouldn’t exactly say that. As I get home after a long day at work, I open the door to the sounds of a shrieking child and an extremely stressed out wife with disheveled hair. “I’ve had to pee for 3 hours, but couldn’t because the baby,” she says as she thrusts the baby into my arms. 30 seconds (and one thankfully empty bladder) later, she walks in the room to a laughing child in the lap of his daddy watching sports. What’s my secret? The art of DISTRACTION! Dads, take notes.

My ultimate goal with my child is to either stop him from crying or to prevent him from crying. Since laughing is the opposite of crying (disagree? Google it. BOOM!), I just try to make him laugh and smile. When he starts to sniffle, I like to throw him up in the air repeatedly until he’s forgotten that he was upset. That way I can keep watching the Cubs lose while he goes and knocks over the cats’ water bowl. I don’t care. He’s not crying, right? Another distracting trick is to shake my head back and forth. He laughs uproariously! His favorite for some reason is when I pretend to be that big black lady with an attitude from that one credit card commercial. The trick is to shake your head back and forth repeatedly and shout “I’m a big black lady with an attitude! NOW HOW CAN I HELP YOU!?” It works, guys. Try it. Seriously. Attention Deficit Disorder is a wonderful thing.

Distraction need not be used solely when the bb is crying. Our little bear cub likes to flip onto his stomach while we change his diaper. At first, I would try to prevent him from doing it. This only made him flip out and burst my ear drums with his deafening shrieks. I then allowed him to flip over, but that led to poop EVERYWHERE. I decided, finally, to try my distraction method. It takes every trick in the book, but it works! The big black woman with an attitude distracts him from rolling, and the… shit. Sorry guys. Gotta go. Baby is crying for some reason. I’ll be back next week.

No Way I’m The Only One Feels This Way! Right?

Not that I have a long list of things I don’t like about being a wife because most of it is awesome but there is one thing that bothers ME when I know it really shouldn’t. I have this weird ideal of what the “perfect” housewife should be. I feel bad if I take a shower in the morning and never make it to the hair and makeup step or I feel crappy if there are dishes in the sink. I know it’s SO STUPID but it really does bother me sometimes! I think it all comes from my mother, she’s like fricken supermom who could wash the floor and blow dry her hair at the same time. But me, nah, I am not that talented.
For example, Everett and I had swim classes this morning. So now, here it is 2:30 in the afternoon and I’ve yet to even shower. Missed the opportunity during nap time because I was doing the other 3,000 things. I just want to be my prettiest for the husband when he gets home. He never never never complains but I do. Hmmmmm, End Rant.

New Followers / New Layout

I’m so excited to have all these new followers 🙂 I hope you guys find some enjoyment out of my posts and as always feel free to comment! I also have up a new layout! Check it out 🙂

Wow, What a Week!

Being a military family, one of the hardest parts of being away is the constant missing friends and family. I have only been apart of this lifestyle for a little over a year now and as it does get easier, it still isn’t easy. I feel even worse because of the fact that we do have a baby and I can’t imagine how hard it is for them to be missing a lot of the things that happen during the first year. Meh, it’s what I signed up for. 

Well, this week my parents and younger brother came for a visit. It was my dads first time in San Antonio so we wanted to make sure they got to see a lot. Plus, my dad is the type where he has to stay busy to be entertained. 
One of the first adventures we went on was the San Antonio caverns. My brother is on the left (as if you can’t tell, we’re damn twins that just so happen to be three years apart) I did previously blog all about the caverns so I won’t go crazy posting all those pictures again. 
My oh so pretty momma and myself 🙂 

Caught my dad and Everett off guard here 🙂 
The day after the caverns we decided to try out the zoo. I’ve been several times and always find some enjoyment out of it. This time, sheesh, 90 plus degrees and not a cloud in sight. Lets just say I was over it pretty quickly. 
My favorite was this tree bear who seemed to want to attack us. He didn’t appreciate Everett crying. 
We’re huge sports fans in this house. Our hockey teams have been playing each other in the playoffs. (Detroit Red Wings vs. Chicago Blackhawks). We have to try SO hard to be nice. Oh so hard. This photo montage basically sums up what we’re like every time they play. Since my family was here, poor husband had 3 other Red Wings fans in the house. He was a pretty good sport about it, for the most part. 
On Wednesday we decided to go up north a bit and float the river. It’s a super popular thing to do down here. Basically, rent a tube get some beer and relax as you float. I’ve been wanting to do it since I moved down here but it’s very hard to get a babysitter! We actually had the chance to do it this time! My mom isn’t much for water sports so she happily agreed to stay home and hang out with Everett. I obviously couldn’t bring my camera but these following photos sum up the events afterwards. 
NOTE: my dad was driving and NOT intoxicated. I don’t condone drinking and driving EVER!  San Antonio drivers are known for slamming on their breaks. 
NO ONE WAS INJURED. Except the Rental car. Phew. 
As you can see the other car had no damage. Note to self, get a Nitro. 
How cute is my momma and baby?! Right. Glad they weren’t in the car 🙂 
My parents love flea markets. I’m not sure why. They are total bargain hunters and my dad collects all kinds of weird things (animal skulls, zippos, taxidermy). So we went to a HUGE one called Traders Village. I actually really enjoyed myself. Once the rain stopped, a lot of the shops opened and I was able to find a lot of laughs. 
Seniors need self defense, right?! Who even owns a VHS player anymore?! 
I sent this photo to my husband teasing that I was going to buy him these shoes. To my surprise he replied with “those are pimp” and actually wanted them. Oh Matt. No. 
Really really really wanted to buy this. Almost did. Until the dude selling it told me he wanted $45 and I searched it on amazon. $35 and less. Psh, nice try. Looks like I inherited some of my parents bargain hunting. 
I did end up taking home two tin signs for my kitchen. I have a wine themed kitchen and these were just too cute to pass up on. $20 for the pair. Couldn’t help myself. 
It really bummed me out to see someone wasn’t saving these. 

Caught my parents being cute 🙂 30 years of marriage as of this weekend and they still hold hands. 
We also have a fellow marine, our friend Kevin in for the weekend. He brought cards against humanity. If you’ve never heard of it, you like apples to apples, & you’re a total sicko…. YOU MUST play it. MUST. 
I’m really going to miss all the action around the house. It’s been an amazing fun filled week with my family. May has been an awesome month! 
(My in laws were actually here 2 weeks ago- this was before my blogging began) Ill be totally bummed out for the next few days because I just love having them here but then life will resume. Crap, normal life resumes this evening when I go back to work!  Happy Memorial Day Weekend everyone!

San Antonio flooding.

What you’re looking at is an under pass of the expressway, not a river. That’s not a shark. It’s a car. This is what happens in a dry state when it rains. Crazy.  

New Layout Coming Soon!

I’m quite challenged in the design department but love a cute lookin’ blog as much as the next guy. So I have decided to have a company help me out 🙂 The new layout will be installed this evening and I’m very excited about it. — If you have any design needs I highly recommend them!

I also noticed there is a section on the site titled “how I learned to design”  It’s a company called mommy blog designs. You better believe I’m going to look into that 🙂 I’m one of those who always wants to keep learning. Why not add in web designer to my list of things I can do!


Welcome to an AMAZING Giveaway Brought to you by:
Musings of a Single Mama
Giveaway Runs 5/22-6/12
Prizes: Step2 Neat & Tidy Cottage
**Specs from Amazon
Open design allows mom and dad to watch children while at play
Features a molded-in kitchen table, faucet, burner and two seats
Accessories not included
Adult assembly required

 Step2 Fun Fold Jr Picnic Table
**Specs from Amazon
Picnic table folds for easy storage and wipes clean easily
Table top can accommodate an umbrella (not included)
Seats four children comfortably

Enter the Rafflecopter below for your chance to WIN both items!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Must be 18 or older to enter. Must reside in the US and have a valid shipping address. No PO boxes. Funny Postpartum Lady is responsible for the shipment of this prize. Must respond to winning notification email within 48 hours or another winner will be randomly selected.

not such a baby anymore!

Do you mommas remember when you had that realization that your baby was really turning into not such a little guy/girl anymore? I looked at him last night and was like “holy shit, you’re a human!” I always have this image in my head of him at 8 pounds drinking 4oz, sad but true. I just am not ready for the growing up stage! Well, last night at dinner we decided to give him small pieces of what we were eating. Chicken. Avocado. Potato. Green beans. He ate it all and loved it. I know this is totally normal but it was my OMG you’re a human moment.

Stop growing so fast little man. 

Natural Bridge Caverns, San Antonio TX

If you ever find yourself in San Antonio, I highly suggest going to check out these caverns. It’s 20$ a person but well spent for proof of how beautiful this world can be. We did a group tour and descended down 140 feet to view it all. There are paths made (but still very steep and slippery) but not too challenging. The husband and myself are planning a return trip to the undeveloped parts of the caverns when you actually have to climb down the walls. How cool does that sound? Anyways! Check it out if you ever get the chance.