I look back at my late teens and early twenties and think about all of the “friends” that I had back then. I was extremely busy with school, working part time, and of course going out. There wasn’t ever a night that I had away from studying that wasn’t spent with people hanging out a bar or doing something of the sorts. I always was surrounded by people but those people quickly faded out of my life as soon as my lifestyle completely changed.
Almost as soon as I graduated, I moved on in life to a completely different chapter. My husband and I welcomed our first child into our family and that’s really when my friends changed. It probably sounds like I’m holding some kind of grudge or resentment towards that change but in all honesty, I’m not. I understand that is exactly what happens when you start a family. That part of your life changes. You don’t go out to the bars all the time anymore. You start to have a reasonable bedtime because 7am is pretty disgusting when you’ve been up all night. It’s actually quite refreshing because I was getting pretty tired of that scene. Anyways, all of that change brought me into thinking a little more in detail about what I wanted in friendships in my “younger” days vs. what I want in friendships now. The difference is astronomical.
- I wanted friends to help me study but know when enough is enough and it was time to drink some beer.
- I wanted friends that would drop everything on a dime and go out and explore the town.
- I wanted friends that would play dress up with me until we got the perfect look.
- I wanted friends to shop with.
- I wanted friends that would stay up till all hours of the night being goofy and then wake up the next day well passed noon and do it all over again.While none of these things are wrong; life is just so different now.
- I want a friends now who, at the drop of a hat, will drop off gatorade, toilet paper, and lysol on my front porch because we all have the stomach flu.
- I want a friends who understands that if I don’t text back for 4 days, I’m not mad. I’m just insanely busy trying to prevent these little people in my life from killing themselves.
- I want friends who don’t mind me dragging around those said little people because they are now and extension of me.
- I want friends who are okay with only hanging out a few times a month but are always there too talk.
- I want friends who will run errands with me. It’s more fun to do the mundane stuff with a pal.
- I want friends who care less about the outside and more about the inside. Lets be honest here, I just don’t have the time or energy anymore to get as fancy as I used too. Seriously, How did I ever find the time to spend 2 hours on hair and makeup?
At this point in my life its all about quality over quantity of friends which is 100% okay with me now. In my past I used to hate being alone and always wanted a friend to hang out with. Now, I am learning to love the silence. I might sound like a total loner but in reality, it’s not all that often in a house with two toddlers you get peace or alone time.